A grandmother faced a dilemma when her daughter-in-law, who had been a stay-at-home mom for four years, asked her to babysit her two children, aged four and two, for nine hours a day for a week. The daughter-in-law had recently landed a job and needed childcare until the daycare could take the children. However, the grandmother declined due to the daughter-in-law’s extensive list of rules for the children, including a vegetarian diet, strict language control, no TV, and scheduled enrichment activities.

The daughter-in-law, desperate not to lose the job opportunity, called the grandmother in tears, asking for help. The grandmother sought advice on Reddit, questioning if she was wrong for refusing or if the daughter-in-law was unreasonable. Responses were mixed, with some supporting the grandmother’s decision, emphasizing that grandparents shouldn’t be treated as free childcare, while others argued she should help her son and daughter-in-law for the sake of family support. Criticism toward the daughter-in-law focused on what some perceived as excessive rules for a short-term arrangement. Some suggested the week could be a vacation for the grandchildren, allowing for more flexibility. Others thought the grandmother should prioritize family over seeing friends during that week.